Waltzing Mathilda

Friday, April 27, 2007

Parenting Sucks

I can't remember the last time Mike and I had a night out. I am sure it was sometime this year. Maybe not. Anyways, tonight was going to be the night-dinner at a nice Mexican place, margaritas, and then a funny movie. Then Mike learned that Maddy had spent most of her day at school vomiting. Oh well. That's that.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Check out the evil....

My parents got Maddy a TMX Elmo (or what I call-Gang Rape Elmo-watch the video-you will see). Admittedly, it was my idea-I saw one at school and thought she would find it amusing.

She doesn't.

(Proof that she's my kid.)

Anyways, you have to check out the video above to appreciate this story. At first, it just made her cry. Now, she watches Elmo do his thing with a mixture of amusement, fear, and nervousness on her face. And, she has to be sitting in her lap. But one time, we turned Elmo on and he started doing his thing near her favorite stuffed cat-she leaped up out of my lap and "rescued" the cat before Elmo could touch it. Thinking it was a fluke, I tried it again with a variety of stuffed animals. Each time, Maddy yelped when she saw the animal was in "danger" and rescued it from Elmo.

I would be glad that at least Elmo is amusing me, but then I remember that I am writing about Elmo in the first place.

I'm so lame.

Monday, April 16, 2007

me too...

still ashamed to admit it tho


what a horrible horrible day

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Social Diseases

A teacher has invited me to a shindig at her house. Shindigs, parties, and other such gatherings generally send me into nervous fits. I am terrible at making small talk or conversing with non-bloodrelatives in general. I realize that I tend to come off as an idiot no matter what evasive action I may take. I tend to say things that only make sense to me, talk too fast, and/or hide in corners. (My blood relatives would probably say I do the same things with them, now that I think about it.)

Therefore, I rarely take people up on such invitations. But I don't want my kid to be a hermit like me, so I am trying to force myself to participate in such things. I told Mike about it and he agreed we should go. "Might be fun," he said.

"But what if she is some sort of pyschomanickillertypeperson?" I said, half-jokingly. "And this is a ruse to trap and murder me?"

"That's OK," he said. "Cause then I'll have a Jamee-skin lamp."

And I have anxieties about other people?

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

If only....

I hate a lot of things.

But I think I hate West Side Story most of all.

Even more than Bush's failed policies and the complete incompetence of our government.

In fact, I think if we were to show the insurgents West Side Story, they would surrender immediately in fear of seeing us dancing and singing.

I wanna be in America!

I watched an ESL teacher try to use it to teach about gang violence.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I mean....

they DANCE! with ittybitty knives!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAQHAHAAH!

(yes, I know there's a "Q")

Oh, I am sooooo scared.

So, I despise this movie. I can't even think of a movie I hate more.But I would totally dig this version.

Mmmmm....brains....

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Look, BabyDaddy finally updated his blog...

Check it out

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Weight Loss Update

I know I have not been updating this as often as I intended, but it has been a crazy semester.

Here are the results:

Me-Original weight: 151.3. Current: 144.2 Net loss: 7.1 lbs
Mike-Original weight: 203.2 Current 203.2 Net loss: 0 lbs

Not exactly what I was hoping for, but I am pleased nonetheless. In addition, I have lost about 4 inches all around.

Now, frankly I thought the contest should have been called off several weeks ago due to Kely's "technicality." So the winner is based on Kevin's results alone and I bet he is the winner. I could be cruel and claim this was all a big April Fool's joke, but everyone involved knows I am not that clever.