Take Notes, People

I would like two of these for birthday/Christmas/or "sorrythatyouhadamomentofstupidityandaccompaniedthreesmallchildren
andagrumpysistertothemallonaSaturdayforsixhourslookingforabusinesssuit
thatyouneitherreallywanttowearnorpaythemoneyfor"-day.

And yes, I am still suit-less.

And yes, I try to buy a suit at least once a year and it always ends up with the same outcome.

But maybe this time I will end up with a set of totally awesome martini glasses.

Madieval

You know how little kids repeat things that they hear a lot? Some child psychologists think this is why a child first starts saying "No!" to everything-it's probably one of the most repetitive word they hear in the first two years of their life. But, children, when practicing their speech, will often repeat phrases and words that they hear over and over again-songs, number and color drills, etc...to help with language development, memory and other such things.

So should I be concerned that today I heard Maddy say to herself "Be nice to teacher!"? I'm afraid to ask the daycare....

Hypocrisy

So, I did my blogstroll-visiting the 5 or 6 blogs that I check out every few days. I was kinda miffed that no one had updated theirs recently (entertain me, people!) when I realized I hadn't either.

So-

Lately, Maddy alternates between Sweetest Being Who Ever Walked the Earth & Quintessential Two Year Old. Guess which one I love more.

I'm getting our sidewalk replaced. It has been slowly crumbling for the past few years. It's been a pain to shovel in the snow-whenever you shovel snow, you invariably get pieces of concrete too. It's gonna be expensive to replace, but the City tears it up for free. They came today and now there is a black hole of dirt by our house.

My mother is trying to convince us to go on a 13 day cruise to Europe...I hate spending money.

Eh, I'm boring myself. Sorry. I'll stop and wait until you more interesting people have something say.

Maddy-isms

Maddy calls many buildings "castles"-most churches and the Charlestown Courthouse, for example.

Puppies are "puckie dogs."

Whenever I do something that Maddy is impressed by, she say, "Berry good, mommy, buko, excrsent." (i.e. Very good, mommy, (indecipherable) excellent).

Today, I was cleaning the floor. This must not happen often, because Maddy was fascinated by it. To the the point, she yelled out "DIRT!" and started dancing across the room.

She constantly asks to hear The Decemberists playing "The Mariner's Revenge Song."

She knows what "beer" is but not "root beer." ( My bad.)

Today, I started teaching Maddy to read using Kolsch words (gotta use my Master's for something.) She can recognize the word "Art". It's a st"art".

We have to do critter roll call every night. We have to account for kitty, second kitty, pucky dog, koala, and bunnyrabbit.

Tonight, Maddy decided she was afraid of the dragon storage bin that has been in her room forever. I think we convinced her it was a good dragon because, in the end, she asked to leave it up.

Never, in my 27 years did I think I would have to advocate on the behalf of a fabric dragon. (btw-they don't teach you these skills in school.)

Nancy grows up

Michael and Emily have introduced me to Radiolab.

Admittedly, I don't find it as fascinating as they apparently do, which is not to say I don't enjoy it. It is nice to listen to when working from home. Like news, but (mostly) not as depressing.

I am currently listening to the one about Time. They did a audio montage of a child going from birth to age 12 within, I believe, 12 seconds.

It was both interesting and disheartening. I could identify very clearly where Maddy currently is in her speech development. And I could see, or hear, rather, at the same time, where she is going. But I cannot fathom Maddy being 12 years old. (Or me being the mother of a 12 year old for that matter. Or still, even a mother for that matter.)

Coincidentally to this podcast, I have been generating a theory in the past few days. You see, Maddy has become increasingly...oh, let's say EXTREMELY irritating lately. For example:

Maddy: "Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. "
Me: "In a minute, baby, I'm cooking dinner." (Literally, hands dripping with turkey juices. Not yummy.)
Maddy: "Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. Mommy, I want some milk. "

Or

Maddy throws something on the floor.

Me: "Maddy, please pick that up."
Maddy: (smiling) "No!"
Me: "Tilda, Mommy asked you to pick that up. Please pick it up or you will go to Time Out. Do you want to go to Time Out?"
Maddy: "Yes! I want to go to Time Out! Mommy, I want to go to Time Out! Mommy, I want to go to Time Out! Mommy, I want to go to Time Out! Mommy, I want to go to Time Out! Mommy, I want to go to Time Out! Mommy, I want to go to Time Out! Mommy, I want to go to Time Out!"

(by the way, Time Out consists of her going to a corner and looking at a wall. She doesn't seem to mind it a bit. Sigh.)

Or

I serve Maddy something for dinner that she has not tried before.

Maddy: "Mommy, its good! I like dinner!"
Me: "Well, I'm glad, Tilda."
Maddy: "No want (insert dinner item here). I want yogurt in the chocolate." (Yeah, you read that right.)

So my theory? Well, at this stage, Maddy is, at most times, Super Cute. No, I mean it. She says cute things, she looks cute, she smiles cutely...almost enough to make me think about having another kid just so I can go through this state again. And then she comes up with the annoying crap specified above. So my theory is that the Terrible Twos exist to convince parents that, eventually, Baby's got to go.

See, if kids remained cute forever, parents would never want them to leave. Therefore, they have to be horrible. That way, parents think and dream of the day that they will, theoretically, be "free" and the Maddys of the world will have to fetch their own damn milk.

SPIDER! (He's NOT My Hero)

So tonight there was a GIANT spider in my bathroom downstairs. Like tarantula-sized. At least 4 inches long. I went "eek!" and got Michael.

It's not that I am scared of spiders, bugs, etc...it's just that they give me the willies. I physically shudder at them. I think of spiders and bugs and my skin crawls. They have long legs and many eyes and ugh, I don't want them near me. And I don't want them in the house or touching my things.

Michael goes on and on about how "spiders are our friends" like some bad after school special. I just want them dead. At least the ones in my house.

But especially big honking spiders. If I let one live and they go back outside, I can't stop thinking that they are just gathering up all of their big honking spider friends, saying "Hey, there are some spider-loving hippies in that warm house. Let's be squatters!" I don't like spider scouts and their spider legions. And so they must die.

Of course, we are short on weapons so I had Michael assault the spider with flea spray (you should have seen the look Mike gave me when I handed him flea spray. Kinda like "Exactly what crazy woman did I marry?"Luckily, he humors me.) It didn't work, so I fell back on my handy-dandy creature killer-Windex. I know my family wonders why I always have some on hand, since I'm not great at cleaning. Well, that's why. Windex is the Patron Saint of Creature Killers.

So tonight, I am on Spider Patrol, checking windows, walls, and anything that looks spider-like. I have to check my sheets. I have already had a heart attack about one of Maddy's stickers that fell on the floor and have been warning the cat, with his long black fur to sleep downstairs tonight. He looks at me with his bright, green eyes and swishes his long, furry tail across my leg. A tail that resembles a huge, black, furry SPIDER leg.

Erg. Spiderwillies.